déjà vu.

i always set myself up to get hurt.
​​​​everyone says 'keep your guard up,' but i don't think i ever had one.
i let everyone in, and they all dent me, and bruise me, and hurt me.
i need a guard. i need something in my head saying someone is bad for me.

i can feel myself getting hurt right now.
but i don't know what do to do stop it.
cause my heart's still going back, digressing.
but... i'll let this happen til i find someone right.

i though we'd last forever, but forever ended todayy.

have you ever felt that you like someone a lot more than they like you?
that they... they just don't care about you the same.
it's a bad feeling. i feel it a lot.
and you know what else it bad?
being on the other end.
knowing someone loves you,
and you don't love them as much.
you can't love them as much.
your heart is somewhere else.
in the hands of a former love.

i wanna scream 'i love you!' at the top of my lungs.

but i'm afraid that someone else will hear me.
<3first post :)

either i could make another stupid love poem,
ramble about my thoughts,
complain about my friends,
or... i'm not sure. ha.


i've been told i'm a listener.
and you know what the problem with being a listener is?
no one thinks you have the problems.
everyone runs to you, saying what's wrong.
and we keep this bottled up.
and then we need another listener.
and we're in this same funk again.
woohoo.
i love being a listener.
but sometimes, just sometimes,
i wish i had someone to talk to.
not someone paid.
someone that wants to hear what i have to say.
they don't have to help.
they just have to listen.